The Latest in My Life

So for those of you who have seen my Facebook status and know me you are probably feaking out and wondering what is going on with my life. Well I am finally posting about it.
For those of you who don't know I work for a company called Namifiers and I absolutely love my job. (Are you freaking out more yet?) I have worked there for about 2.5 years (give or take a month). So about a year ago they started making some changes as the company started to grow. It came to a point where they needed 2 Supervisors. The position was filled by 2 people who had not been there a year yet (wait I just said I had worked there a year doesn't my seniority count for something) over 2 people who had been there for at least a year. The reason for this was they didn't know that we wanted the job (we didn't walk around telling our supervisor that they needed to quit or be fired so that we can take their job). We both stuck around with the promise that the next opportunity we would get the job. Then I found out I was making less money than the people I was training that was not cool. I said something and I got a raise. Then another supervisor position opened up and was given to the other person who was mad the last time but guess what I still worked there longer. The reason I was given was she was on that team already. (I was moved to the team the next day). I figured OK the next one will be mine so I stuck around. At the beginning of the year I was told that a supervisor position was opening up. I was told it would be between me and another person in the company. I figured I would get the position this time. Then there was a rumor going around that the other person got it over me who had worked there about a year. So I started thinking what am I doing wrong. Here are the conclusions that I came to I am not married nor am I living with a significant other. I decided if that was the case that I was going to say have a nice life and just walk out when it was announced. The announcement never came. Then they asked for resumes from all those who are interested. They interviewed 8 people for the job and said they would announce later that week. Great I felt good and confident. Then we were told it would not be until the next quarter that it was announced so we sat back and waited. I started thinking about what would happen if I didn't get the job and I decided that if this time I don't get the job it is because I am not qualified or they can't see me as a supervisor with the company. They filled the position on the 31st of March. The person who got the job has been working for the company for 7 months and is a single mom. Here are my new thoughts on the situation either a I have worked for the company too long or b I am single and I don't have kids. I put my 2 weeks notice in. I was called into the customer service managers office and we talked I felt like he was trying to sell me on staying (sorry but this is a time when you need to get rid of the salesman and be a friend) and I was told he doesn't want me to leave and that he can see me as a supervisor and he wants me to be a supervisor (does anyone see anything wrong with this) and that he needed to give the position to someone people felt comfortable going to whether they need a question answered or they don't feel comfortable and work. The person who got the job informed him that there was a problem where people felt comfortable. (I knew about the problem too but I was asked not to tell so I was encouraging the person to tell someone about the situation oh and I have a knock what seems like every 5 min on my door with someone asking me a question). Oh yeah the customer service manager failed me that is why I didn't get the job he didn't give me enough time and if I stay he will give me 110% if I give him a 110% in return and the next time a position comes up I will be number 1 on the list (shouldn't I have already been there because of my knowledge, skills, and seniority?, oh and I have heard similar before). I was asked to reconsider and I said I would. I was also told the the VP of Sales would like to talk to me and that hasn't happened yet.

SO that is where I am at. I am in a battle with myself. Half of me is saying just quit they can replace you and they can't really see you growing with the company because they would have promoted you by now. Your last job you where there the min amount of time you were allowed to be there before you could start growing with the company (6 months) and then you grew quickly. The other half of me is saying don't quit you need the job so that you can pay for your bills and besides you love your job and the people that you work with you may not find that again. Besides the company is growing you will get it the next time. Then the other side chimes in what if next time never comes and you are to the point that everyone is making more money than you again. Then I help one of my customers that I enjoy joking with or read a review that says you need to do what ever it takes to keep Krystal and the side that wants me to stay speaks up and says see only you can help these customers the way that they like. Looking back over the last few months I haven't been as happy at work as I was before and that was the last time I was looked over for the supervisor position. You can see it in my sales. The quarter before I was on the team that I am on know I did over $200,000 in sales then the next quarter I did $140,000 and then last quarter I did $95,000. I have a feeling it will only get worse unless something changes at work and the only thing I have the power to change is my attitude but it is a subconscious decision that needs to happen. The only way that will happen is if I feel like the work I do is appreciated and that I am appreciated there.

So I am pretty much battling with myself and I can't figure out which side should win. When the quitting side is winning then it is should I stay in Provo or go somewhere else. I just want the battle to be over with it has been going on for 3 months now and it is wearing me out.